Don't say bye

There are few daily phrases that I don't really like to use or to even hear and receive it.

Macam when someone says bye, I wish that bye was not the last bye.

And when one thanked me after I did the favor, I developed afraid feeling. I'm afraid that that person won't needed me nkr remember me anymore after that.

Even the first hi from new person. I'm afraid that I looks bad during the first impression. And they gonna judge me after that.

I wish that no one ever saying final bye towards me. I wish that no one disappear after thanked me. I wish no one ever judge at the first hi

Nak juga...

Dulu...... Time aku sekolah, aku selalu compare diri aku dengan akak and abang aku. Mak ayah aku tak compare, tapi aku sendiri yang compare. Aku compare siapa lagi pandai, siapa lagi banyak chances, siapa lagi rajin, oh tak dilupakam results pun aku compare kan.

Time aku ambil UPSR, abang aku ambil PMR, akak aku ambil SPM. So, both of them mak hantar tuition. Tapi aku mak tak hantar. Katanya,  tak perlu. Baru UPSR.....

Dan bila aku ambil PT3, aku still tak pergi tuition. Kelas tambahan pun tak ada. Apa yang diajar dekat sekolah, itu aku hadam. Yang lebih lebih aku study sendiri. Aku telaah sendiri.

Kadang tu aku jealous betul dengan classmates yang pergi tuition. They get more... Macam tu juga aku jealous dengan my other siblings.

Sometimes aku rasa, aku tak dapat apa yang akak and abang dapat, and tu lah..... Mesti aku rasa parents aku tak fair enough.

Tapi aku faham. Gaji ayah berapa lah sangat... But still...

Sampai la ni, I'm the only one yang dapat duduk jauh, stay asrama. Aku rasa this the way mak ayah nak prove they still love anak anak sama rata.

Ayah pinjam kamu, bukan miliki kamu

I've read somewhere, seorang ayah write about his journey having a daughter. It touched my heart...

The father tell from his daughter was born, it was different from his first born, which is his son. His daughter didn't feed as much as his son would.

Then when the daughter grow a little, she starts to demand girly stuf, doll, dress, having long hair and so on.

Come the moment his daughter having vagina issues. It starts to produce mucus, itching. So he had to get pantyliner for his daughter. The episode continue with she having her PMS... He then gotta get bunch of pads after that.

When his daughter started her PMS journey, he then begin to think that his daughter are growing way too fast. Later, she will bring a man and he'll let the man take over his job.

So, the father concluded that his daughter is just a pinjaman that he is never miliki. She is her husband's. As a father he just take care and treat her well to present to pemilik sebenarnya, jer husband.

Okay, serious talk memang touchy. So, selama ni struggle seorang ayah adalah struggle untuk menyempurnakan puterinya yang kemudian hari bakal menemui pemilik sebenarnya? 😖😭😭😭😭

Bad morning

Pagi tadi aku bangun bangun, tengok pintu dorm aku terkuak. Ada orang keluar tak tutup balik. Aku pun merungut "Ish...Tutuplah pintu balik..." sebab it was raining, sejuk weh

Lepas tu dapat pula nightmare about electric stuff... Aku kena renjatan and api was everywhere. Mungkin bayangan neraka... Tah lah.

Aku bangun balik, tengok jam, dah 6.40. Gosh, kelam kabut aku wehhhh nak mandi lagi, nak siap, nak solat lagi.

It was a bad morning.

Apa Punya Mimpilah?

Aku mimpi kemain mengarut lagi weh malam tadi!

Siap terbangun lepastu sambung balik mimpi yang sama!

Aku mimpi yang aku dah engaged dengan someone ni.. Tapi dia tak ada lah ready mana for marriage, but he proves to me that he is ready. Ha, kemain! Siap tunjuk kat aku, rumah kosong yang bapak dia bagi dia siap full furnished sendiri!

Lepas tuuuuu mak dia Chinese looks, she gave me hadiah baju banyak gila... And she said "I tak tahu lah apa nak bagi dekat Melayu!" 😂

Mengarut woi!

Ramadhan 1440H

Puasa tahun ni lain maciammm vibe dia. Aku happy kemain nak terawikh. Sekali dengar selawat nak start terawikh, ha kau..... Melimpah air mata. Air mata rindu pada bulan Ramadhan... Air mata gembira sebab Allah pilih aku untuk jumpa dengan bulan Ramadhan... Air mata takut kalau kalau nikmat manisnya puasa ditarik...

Sebelum solat isya', kami semua ada buat bacaan yaasin. Sebab one of ayah student kami baru meninggal dunia. Sesampai ayat 'Kunn fayakunn' diantara dua perkataan tu, aku berdoa "Ya Allah kurniakanlah aku nikmat puasa" A very quick doa, tapi Alhamdulillah Allah makbulkan...

Manisnya menjawab selawat sebelum terawikh. Manis lagi dapat berjemaah terawikh. Semoga Allah tak tarik perasaan ni. Moga panjanglah waktu Allah pinjamkan nikmat perasaan ni...

Hint lagi

Aku tahu tahun ni tak ada 29th February, tapi kalau nak juga bagi hadiah, aku terima je😌

Kalau bab hadiah ni aku prefer benda yang tak habis and useful.

Kalau sebelum ni aku dah sebut apa kebenda yang aku suka as hadiah, la ni aku nak specific kan sikit.

Entah kenapa aku back into collecting tudung. Hari tu aku terjumpa tudung satu ni, lawa, labuh, not too pricey.

Tudung apa? Go to Properhijab.com -> Search Yuna Lulu -> Choose black 😌😌😌

Heeeee